Describe how you have prepared for your intended major
I’m am quite passionate about my major, political science, both within and outside the classroom. If people are born to fulfill a certain role in life, there is no doubt in my mind or anyone who knows me, I was born to serve the United States of America.
Graph 1: I wouldn't say I'm passionate about my major directly but instead discuss your passion for public service and policy which drove you to political science. "I was born to serve" sounds a bit arrogant and besides no admissions officer knows you personally.
As a child I adored men such as Benjamin Franklin and George Washington because they demonstrated that through politics chains of tyranny can be yanked off and a new nation constructed. Although my schooling has taught me a lot, I’ve also learned a lot outside of the classroom. As an avid reader since elementary school, I’ve literally read every book I could find about US and World history, great presidents, the government and biographies of great innovative men and women.
Graph 2: 1st sentence is too long. Split it into two. Last sentence also too long. Cut out the redundant phrases of "I've read... every book... and biographies."
A political science student who attempts to analyze the state of a country solely based on the present, without an understanding of its history or economics is quite foolish in my opinion and will find himself stuck in a fantasy. Therefore, I believe my lifetime of research and unique understanding of the full political spectrum: past, present and future; will help me succeed in upper division courses.
Graph 3: First sentence way too long. Also is your perspective that unique? I suspect tens of thousands of poli-sci students feel the same way.
Although, I do consider myself well-versed in politics, I in no way think I know everything about the subject. I love learning new information, hearing another point-of-view
Graph 4: Awkward series of sentences and a missing period.
I believe my course history speaks for itself, I have a taken a variety of political science class such ranging from International Relations to the Ethics of Emerging Military Technologies. Not only is my coursework regarding my major broad but I have achieved a consistent A minus in my major related course work.
Graph 5: Cut "I believe my coursework speaks for itself". Does it really?
Due to my understanding of the pillars that make up political science, my personal studies, and my performance in lower division political science class I believe I am prepared to be a successful political science student.
Graph 6: I would rewrite to: " Due to my understanding of the foundations that make up political science, my personal studies, and performance in lower division major coursework I believe I will be a successful...". Even what I wrote is too long but it's a good place to start.
As I got older I realized that politics was really about making a large and positive change in the lives of people, really politics is not the act governance and helping it is also the creation of history. And so I became interested in the political process learning all I could about the United States the electoral process and the issues that nation faces. I also began reading about great politicians from George Washington to Winston Churchill people able to change their world for the good.
Graph 7: Seems to be a second/third version of your essay embedded at this point.
I have always been interested in politics. Since I was a child I adored men such as Benjamin Franklin and George Washington. They showed that politics can be used to construct a new nation and yank off the chains of tyranny, inspiration that is all to often missing from the modern political process.
I wish someday to be an apart of that political process, to attempt to live up to the example set by Washington and Franklin. And I believe in political life there is no substitute for experience. And so seeing how policy is actually formulated and implemented will give me an education that textbooks never could. I believe I will be able to see how political, ideological, and practical concerns are balanced in order to craft the laws
I will get to witness the political process first hand, hearing speakers whom have served in government postings and whom have had a direct effect on domestic and international policy. I have been to Washington once but only as a tourist, never as someone whom went to learn the ins and outs of politics and policy. Perhaps I will get to see the balancing act that goes into policy and politics as in what parts of policy are warped to make room for the inevitable weight of politics.
With that said I have prepared myself in order to benefit greatly from what the institute has to offer. I have been interested in history and politics as long as I can remember. When I was a child I devoured books about George Washington, Thomas Jefferson and Abraham Lincoln. When I became a little bit older I expanded my horizons becoming interested in world history and the American political process. I feel that the experience of the institute will bring me closer to making my dreams come true, and so I believe I have worked to be able to learn what the institute has to teach me.
I believe Washington DC is a inspirational place, one, while currently despised by Americans as a symbol of partisan politics, can be a place where great issues are debated and compromise meted out. I wish to one day enter public life perhaps as an elected or appointed official. It is something I had always aspired to, and I believe first hand experience can put me in the best possible position to accomplish my dreams.